Bye Bye, Birdie

When my oldest son was about 7 years old, he wanted to sleep in a tent in the backyard one night. I was a little hesitant about letting him do it because we had lived in this city for only a year or two and were a little concerned about the crime here. I tried not to show my fear and told him "Okay, and I'll leave the back door unlocked in case you need to come inside in the night." That night, my husband and I helped him get settled in the tent, kissed him goodnight and went inside to get ready for bed ourselves. It was a restless night for me. At about six a.m., Brody came running into the house, stood by my bedside and whispered really loudly "I did it, Mom!" He was so so proud of himself!

Brody's Grade 1 Picture

Now Brody is moving almost across the country to Ontario travelling in a van that he has fashioned into a camper. I don't know when I will see him again. I will miss him dearly but I know this is something he needs to do. After all, he's 21 years old, working night shifts slinging burgers at Denny's...who wouldn't want something else in life?

I can't help thinking of the time when he was this little boy determined to sleep in the backyard in a tent. I worried back then about whether he'd be okay and I worry now. Motherhood isn't easy.

Below my worry, I'm excited for him. He is young, single and nothing is holding him here. I want to hug him and not let him go, but that wouldn't be fair to him. Brody is craving adventure--I see it in his eyes. He's got a friend living in the area where he'd like to go so I know he won't be totally alone. He also enjoys his own company and I know will enjoy trying and seeing new things. The girl who stole his heart is out east too. She's a lovely girl that still holds his heart although they broke up a couple of years ago. They still talk...a lot! (Maybe one day they'll let me write their story.)

The day he left, it was a windy cloudy rainy cool day....the kind of day for a funeral....you know what kind of day I'm talking about. My heart ached all day as I was thinking of Brody, alone, sleeping in his van somewhere along the TransCanada highway. I can't help wondering "Did we teach him well enough to handle whatever may happen on this trip?"

I'm confident that we did.

A Mother Can Brag, Right?

My baby girl just turned 14 years old. Fourteen I said. She's starting high school in the fall.

When she was little, we thought she was the prettiest little girl in the world.....and she still is. We even considered chaining her up at home--never letting her go anywhere---so nobody could break her heart. That is, until, she was about 5 or 6 and she said her first vulgar word--my fault---totally my fault--sorry about that.

She is a sweet heart. Raelynn is very soft-spoken and gentle. I see a lot of myself at that age in her...except for the sweetheart, soft-spoken and gentle part. I see her struggles and I wish I could take any hurting she's feeling away from her. But I can't.

She is very different than her fourteen-year-old friends. Her friends look like they're going on 18 or 20 years old whereas Raelynn actually looks younger than her 14 years. She will be asked for identification FOREVER. She's very mature for her age and is getting herself mentally ready to move out on her own one day. She can cook, bake and clean. She manages her allowance surprisingly well. She's getting phenomenal grades and has been on the honour roll in her middle school for two years now.

But look out! If she gives me a smile and challenges me to a game of ping-pong, I know some horns will start growing out of the front of her head any minute. She can get tough when it's called for.

Little things about her make me smile. It won't matter how many disagreements we have or how far away she will move from me one day, I will always see her eyes when she observes a beautiful sunrise.

I'm forever grateful that God chose me to be her mother.

...and by the way...she didn't want me to post a recent picture of her on my blog so the picture you see above is from a long time ago.

Why Can't You Just Be a Princess?

I know, I know....I should be encouraging individuality with my daughter but if you saw what I'm sewing up for her Halloween costume this year, you might be on my side. "Why can't you just be a Teletubbie?" I may ask her as we're browsing Halloween Alley, answered with silence and the "look". Don't know where she gets that from.

Over the years I've had to put together a costume or two...sometimes purchased and sometimes put together creatively . My daughter is 13 and still loves dressing up for Halloween. Her brothers were done with dressing up for All Hallow's Eve by that age. Raelynn is going to be....you know those kind of people....the ones that are 35 years old and go to work for their 8-hour shift in full clown attire and feel totally comfortable with it.

Really, I am okay with making her costumes.

The school girl uni still needs some touches but I've got the major parts done.
Ooops....don't look at the fireman's calendar to the right.

This year she is some sort of anime character, I think? I don't know, but I do know that I'm sewing up a black and red Japanese school girl uniform. To order the uniform was to cost a ridiculous amount of money but going to Fabricland when they have the Buy 1 Metre, Get 2 Free Metres Event was priceless. (I'll need lots of fabric because there's a good possibility that I'll screw it up the first time.) I love it that Raelynn doesn't mind homemade costumes because they're usually a whole lot nicer than the store-bought ones that come in a 9x12 plastic bag and thinner than tissue paper. Besides, you can be much more creative and authentic-looking if you can put together your own costume.

Coleson & Raelynn...Coleson's is homemade, believe it or not

Here's a few costumes of Halloween past...

I think this is Brody

This is Brody but Coleson also wore
this costume 5 years later.
This one
is also homemade....my first!

Brody is a ninja....homemade costume

Raelynn is a ....fairy? The store-bought little girls' costumes all look the same to me....princesses, fairies, they're all the same

Our house isn't quite as busy at this time of the year as it used to be. Now that the youngun's are getting bigger, I can make the time for Raelynn's costumes. She approached me sometime in August with her ideas and together we figured out how we could make it happen.

Gone are the ghosts, grim reapers, princesses and fairies that I used to buy off the Wal-Mart shelves.

Can I Get Directions to the Nearest Insane Asylum?

Now, I wasn't going to make this site of mine a "how-to" blog but on occasion I may share my vast knowledge on a particular subject. I'll start off by saying that once your children are teenagers, it's all payback and parents should take full advantage of it. For instance, I have this apron that has mustaches all over it and everytime I wear it, the conversation goes something like this...."Coleson?" and he says "Yep" and then I wait until he looks at me and I say "I mustache you a question". He just shakes his head and tries with all his might not to smile.

The Dispicable Apron

Another approach a parent may try is to recite lines from movies and childhood shows frequently. For example, when you walk into a room where your teenager is sitting, probably his or her room, and yell "Who...made... this... great ...big... mess?!" (This is from the Big Comfy Couch... if anyone had the pleasure of watching at least a hundred episodes of this show, you probably own a straight jacket). Shrek and Toy Story movies have some great lines to use on your teenager until they run screaming from the room.

Or how about when your teen is in the bathroom, walk by and knock on the door and yell "I have to pee!" ...even though there are other bathrooms in the house and you don't have to go pee. Every now and then when my teenager steps on my toe or bumps into me, I yell "ouch!" A really good one (I'm quivering as I'm thinking about it because I LOVE this one) when your teenager passes their learners license you can inconveniently ask them to drive you places like the grocery store or gas station at all hours of the day....preferably when they're playing games on the computer with their friends or better yet, wake them up early on a Saturday or Sunday morning.

Remember, your quest is to get the eye roll.

If the truth should be told, I don't think I've ever caught a full-on eye roll but I know I may have to stop tormenting my offspring at some point or one day I'll get a pat on the head and the nurses will say "there, there".

The Oldest Munchkin

Our oldest child moved out on his own about a year ago. He knew and we knew when it was time for him to get out of the house. Brody's a great guy and didn't cause us too much grief while he was at home but it came to a head the last few months before he moved. I felt awful the day he and his friend started carrying all his belongings out to the truck. I had to keep myself in check because I kept thinking "Have I failed with Brody?". No! I didn't fail...if he was smart and brave enough to decide to live on his own, then there was no reason why he shouldn't be moving on. Why was I feeling bad? He needed his own space and besides, he wasn't living that far from us.

Brody in his room at our old house.
One of those sticky notes on his computer says "Get a Job"

Brody went to the college the year after he graduated from high school. He took one year of the Computer Technician Program and decided that wasn't for him. Now he's back at the college, upgrading so he can get into an engineering course at the University. He's paying for this himself this time and it's hard to watch my boy struggle but I know it's for the best. Nowadays he appreciates it when we offer to buy tires for his car for his birthday.

I know Brody's a busy man now, trying to build a life for himself and I try to connect with him every week or so without nagging. I invite him over for supper every now and then and on occasion he'll just pop in to talk for a few minutes.

I wish him all the luck in the world.....although it'll be his hard work and dedication that will determine whether he gets through the tough stuff. It's hard to keep your head up when all the stress in the world seems to be sitting on your shoulders but I know he can do it. He's stubborn. 

Stop and Smell The Flowers

Our kids are under so much pressure these days. Besides me nagging them all the time to wake up on time to catch the bus, eat a decent breakfast and whatever else I decide to nag them about that day, they also have the pressures of selecting a post secondary school and careers at very young ages. That's almost crazy. I think schools want to see their students succeed but sometimes there's a price that many are not prepared to pay. I hate watching stressed kids. I remember holding down a part-time job myself while going to school. I couldn't do it.
Here in Alberta, kids can write their learners license at the age of 14! That's fine and dandy, but when I'm in the passenger side of my truck, staring at my 14-year-old child BEHIND THE WHEEL, it scares me at first. First thing I tell them is that they have, have, have to listen to me or else I'll just pay to have them take driver's ed. Number one, I don't want my truck banged up and number two, I'd like for us to come back home alive. So far I haven't had to pay for driver's ed. (Notice how my truck was more important than our lives.) In my opinion, 14 years old is way to young to be behind the wheel of a vehicle even if it's with an experienced driver.

Don't get me wrong, I want my offspring to work hard and be successful in life, but they're expected to start so young. The tension building in teens today is scary.

With all the pressure our kids are experiencing right now, it makes my heart smile when I see them smiling, laughing, being with friends or just plain having a good time. I loved it when my daughter, Raelynn, came to me a few days ago and showed me this photo.

This is a picture she took with her tablet early one morning from her bedroom window. She loves looking at the sky, day and night. This picture tells me she took time away from her busy, over-worked mind, to enjoy something relaxing to her. I suppose life's about balance and even these young ones need to learn to release tension productively.

I also need to learn to stop and smell flowers more often just like Daffodil here likes to do. Except I don't think she's actually smelling the scent of the flowers. 

The Concussion Game. Sorry I Meant Football

So here we are watching Winston Churchill Bulldogs Football on Thursday night. This is Coleson's High School team. Unfortunately they lost once again but it was a great game. They were playing really good at the beginning but somewhere along the line they lost their mojo. The score was something like 43-26 for the Chinook Coyotes. 

Raelynn and Mike. Raelynn has been enjoying the football games this year. I'm sure I enjoyed watching boys running around in tight pants at that age too. ;)

And here we are.....the fearless leaders of our Dyck clan.....of the Lethbridge chapter. That night was a nice evening. We're usually in toques, mitts and heavier jackets.

When we grew up in southern Manitoba, football was not a popular sport and I knew absolutely nothing about it. Since Coleson has been playing, I've been learning and enjoying it. We encouraged Coleson to play when the opportunity came to him last year. He has never played before but he loves it. Mike and I played plenty of sports as youngsters and it's not just the sport itself that is so enjoyable, it's the camaraderie the team shares.